just-- i want to jack in right here okay, jack into him right there, so i can feast on his impotent rage. >> tonight wasn't an msnbc debate was it? it just wasn't. i don't know what was doing out there. i don't know how he let romney get away it with it. they are part of your 47%. you want to-- you don't have any chance, what are you talking about. where was obama tonight! he should watch -- -- with was romney doing, winning. obama should watch msnbc. >> stephen: i'll vote for anything that moves! (laughter) folks, i am not surprised that romney crushed it. because this debate was right in his wheelhouse. soul-crushing. in fact, it was so tedious i think man in the front row fell asleep. (laughter) the first half hour, the first half hour, folks. (applause) the first half hour was an or geoof tax policy minutish-- orgy was tax policy minutia, and they moved on to the intricacies of medicare solvency it was off the hook, in that it would have been more interesting to listen to a dial tone. (laughter) but however wonky it got last night there was no miss tacking that there was a fire

junior!! alllllriggghtttt! that's what you're wearing! what? thank you jack for bringing the cheesesteaks. well i just want to know what my favorite philly cousins think about my new- sourdough cheesesteak melt. i took all the best parts, thinly sliced steak, melty cheese, onions and peppers but i put it on warm, toasty sourdough. fan-cy. sourdough is my thing. i'm busting your chops, the cheesesteak's good. say it. you're better at hockey. >> welcome back, everybody. we are talking with the creator of breaking bad vince gill-- gilligan. >>> obviously the character is the bad guy. >> right. >> and gets badder every day. >> yes, he does. >> stephen: but he's also a small businessman, you know, he's a job creator. >> he is. >> stephen: you know, he built that. >> yeah. obama didn't build that. obama is not cooking that up. >> i know. in some ways he is a success story, right. >> he is, he hasn't outsource to india. he is making it right in the good old usa. >> stephen: every season he expands. they are into europe now, right. >> they are into the czech republic, yeah. that is great market f

!! alllllriggghtttt! that's what you're wearing! what? thank you jack for bringing the cheesesteaks. well i just want to know what my favorite philly cousins think about my new- sourdough cheesesteak melt. i took all the best parts, thinly sliced steak, melty cheese, onions and peppers but i put it on warm, toasty sourdough. fan-cy. sourdough is my thing. i'm busting your chops, the cheesesteak's good. say it. you're better at hockey. >> welcome back, everybody. my guest tonight has a new album titled the sound of the life of the mind. fortunately, my mind has n no-- please welcome ben folds five. (cheers and applause) hey, ben, pleasure to see you, robert, darren, good to see you. hey, thanks to much for coming on. >> sure, yeah. >> good to be here. >> now it's ben folds five. why only three s it because five is the best number? >> it had sort of-- was supposed to be a joke. and it wasn't funny. (laughter) >> we thought it was hilarious. like i came home, he was mowing the lawn and he just was like hanging off the lawn mower and just laughing hysterically that day. and then-- did you laugh. >> i did

. the past two years of relentless campaigning will mean jack squat. total reset back to year zero of america. we will abandon the cities and seek refuge in cliff side caves speaking only in hushed tones about the time man stole fire from the sky. money for our currency should be blood sacrifice offered to our new rulers, a race of superintergent feral cats. (laughter) oh, show us your mercy, whiskered ones. (laughter) or-- or romney could get a two-point bump. either way it's news. (laughter) right now, folks, the obama people where are december it fromly trying to lower expectations. it's sad, just listen to obscene your advisor and anthropomorphized vanishing sound david plouffe. (laughter) jim? >> we've accepted that governor romney will have a good night. he's prepared more than any candidate in himselfry and shown himself to be a good debater through the years. we're sure he'll put on quite a show wednesday. >> yes, if there's one word america associates with mitt romney it's "show." (laughter) meanwhile, the romney people aren't playing these silly games. they're just being honest when

it is safe to stay at those levels. >> colbert: whatever, dr. low t, maybe if your hormones were jacked through the roof you would have the balls to jam needles into peoples in exclusive clinical trials! [ cheers and applause ] >> colbert: what could possibly go wrong? >> there are serious possible side effects of too much testosterone. blood clots, liver damage and some doctors are concerned about its impact on prostate cancer. >> colbert: i was watching those disastrous, instead of listening to those warnings i was checking out his muscles. >> colbert: we need to balance them out with some lady juice. that's why prescott is proud to introduce testosterin which is testosterone and estrogen. folks, with lots of this stuff you will not only have six-pack abs you will have double d breasts. you will never be lonely again. side effects of this may include sickening and enlargening of the heart and a hideous portrait in the attic that ages as you stay young. >> that is so much for pharmaceutical, look for our display in the bodies exhibit. until next time, i will see you in hell! >> colbert

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